keep dreaming.

1st May 2012

Post

im scared.

so lately a lot of my moms friends have been going through relationship issues, people that i never would have expected to, ever. on the outside they seem so happy. im amazed by how much my mom has been there for them, i guess thats where i get it from. so what scares me? it scares me that i never saw this coming. it scares me that this could happen to my parents and that im just as oblivious to it as i was to our family friends. the word divorce is thrown around way to easily, as is love. so yeah, im scared. divorces are more common now than ever, and yeah my parents seem fine but you never know. when my friends parents told her that they were divorcing her and her siblings were completely blind sided. they were the last couple i expected to do that. also my aunt and uncle seperated, luckily they are back together but i cried every night that they did up until they were. so thats why im so scared. if my parents ever got divorced, i cant imagine how much my anxiety would skyrocket more than it already is. im worried i wont have anyone to turn to, i mean, i know i will but theres just something in me thats worried. thank god for one direction, becuase they are what makes me happy; them and my cousin emily. she has down syndrome and has a smile on her face all the time, just hearing her voice, or one directions, can make me smile no matter how depressed i am. im also scared, that to tell people about my axiety and depression, im scared they will think im wierd or that its all in my head. so there, i said it. im scared, im scared, IM SCARED.